Inspiration for this post: The one and only Mistress.
I am in no way saying it is okay for a woman/man to cheat on their partner. What I am saying is that there is wrong and dead wrong.
1. You are on a diet and you decide that you want to cheat. Wrong is having a small hamburger from MacDonald. Dead wrong is having a small hamburger from McDonald, a large order of fries, two apple pies and large cup of diet soda to wash it down.
Respectfully cheating(oxymoron) on your partner
1. Never bring the person to your home to sleep with them. This is so disrespectful to your spouse. This can also lead to a violent confrontation if your spouse walks in and catches you in the act.
2. Never introduce the person you are cheating with to your children. This is so disrespectful to your spouse and it also increases the likelihood that you will be caught.
3. Always use a protection with the other person. You must, there are no if ands or buts about it, unless you want to take the risk of unplanned pregnancy(hello Maury show) or bringing a disease home to your partner.
4. Men do not sleep with prostitutes or women who have been with everyone guy in the city. By sleeping with these type of women you increase the chances that you will pick up a STD. Women stay away from the thugs, men who have been in jail for long periods of time(DL), sexual freaks and guys who have sleep around with to many women. As you should know woman are more susceptible to various STDS therefore it is important that we try to choose out partners carefully.
5. Never ever ever ever perform or%l sex on someone who is not your partner. I can not stress this enough. Keep your mouth off of anything below the waist.
6. Never call your partner by the other persons name in the heat of passion.
7. Hide the evidence(no used condoms in your pocket, receipts, etc ).
8. Never spend your spouse's money on another person. I have read stories about men who set their mistress in apartments and gave them large allowances. Never do this with your spouses money or take away money from your children to spend on a lover.
9. Always shower before you see your partner. Never let your partner kiss/touch you if you have not washed the sent of your lover away.
10. Never ever ever ever sleep with your partner's relative, best friend, co-worker or neighbor. To sleep with someone who is close to your partner could deeply wound him or her, and cause your partner to have deep trust issues for a very long time.
* With all of these rules, I think it is better if you just broke it off with your partner to sample a new dish.
4 months ago