Friday, September 08, 2006

Abortion Clinic

I recently went to an abortion clinic with someone. Since I've come of age I have always been pro-choice for myself and everyone else. After going to the clinic I've begun to reconsider my position. There were about 8-10 women in the clinic that day to have the procedure. I was happy to see that only one woman was by herself. Before I arrived at the clinic, I thought that I would see a room full of lonely crying women who felt uncomfortable and sick with regret about their decision to abort their fetus/baby .
That was not the case, many of the women felt totally fine with their decision. In fact, one woman walked out of the surgical area, and the first thing she said to her boyfriend was "I'm ready to go eat". I thought to myself well damn, was it really that easy. The boyfriend of "lets eat" woman took it upon himself to make fun of the one lady who was there by herself. He could not understand why she had no friends,boyfriend or family with her for support.She was also of Middle Eastern or Indian decent, so culture may have played a role in why she was in the clinic by herself, but he was a Ghetto Boy so you know he could not think that deep(within 4 hours homeboy hit at least 15 of 40) . I took it upon myself to explain to him that she may have been a victim of rape. I then asked him if he thought a rapist would accompany his victim to get an abortion. Luckily he was able to see things from my point of view and backed off of the woman.

The one incident that made me rethink my view on abortion occurred when one young woman walked back into the waiting area after having the procedure with a very,very,very sad expression all over her face. When she went outside, she proceeded to break down and cried her heart out. I imagined myself in her shoes, and I could see that I may have behaved in the same manner if I were in her shoes. One thing that will never change with me is the fact that no matter how I may feel about abortion for myself, I am prochoice for everyone else. Although, I would prefer if people not use abortion as a form of birth control. I am aware of two people who have had 9-10 abortions each, yes your eyes are not fooling you 9-10 each.

I know that many women are completely prochoice until they find themselves facing an unplanned pregnancy. Then they suddenly find themselves questioning abortion. I've always said that I would not have a baby with a man if I was not in a loving marriage in which the man was not willing to do his share of childcare duties(changing pampers,babysitting,feedings etc..). I don't know anymore, I think I may be changing a little. That said, I think the likelihood(I hope) of me being in that position is very slim since I use bithcontrol AND condoms. Honestly, I just don't know how I feel about being in the shoes of one of women in the clinic.

11 comments:

The Stiltwalker said...

I've had 3.

LovelyMonAmi said...

An abortion is a fact of life. Some have 1 others have many. Sad but true. Why was the atmosphere so casual, the weight was being lifted from their shoulders, that is why. Most crash after the procedure... so don't let the nonchalant attitudes fool you.

The Mistress said...

You have no idea how relieved I am that my sexual assault didn't lead to an unwanted pregnancy. I am totally pro-choice but I can't imagine what it would be like to actually have one.

Still, seeing as though I've been on the Depo shot for 10 years and it's possible I can't even get pregnant, I wouldn't hesitate to have an abortion if my birth control failed me. I just can't see myself having a child ever.

Bottom line though, we all need to take responsibility for our reporoductive health.

Raymond said...

I took it upon myself to explain to him that she may have been a victim of rape. I then asked him if he thought a rapist would accompany his victim to get an abortion.

It's been said a picture's worth a thousand words.

My dear you just made one word worth a thousand pictures.

ABBEY said...

I feel you on the whole issue. I don't even know if I'm prochoice or prolife, I think every situation and every one is unique. With all the kids being born without fathers today, who grow up in the hood and repeat the cycle, you wonder if some people need to think twice before popping out kids but then there's kirk franklin and nick cannon who were almost aborted. I've come full circle. Every situation is unique.

A woman on the move said...

While I do believe every woman should have a right to abort a child, I also believe we as women need to take better care of ourselves. Nothing is wrong with being sexually active, it’s NOT being responsible that separates the child from the adult having sex. And of course there are incidents that a woman had no control over, and absolutely she should have a right to choose.

Like you, birth control pills have been my best friend always and of course condoms. Some of my friends wait until they’re sexually active before taking the pill again. My thing is, why wait? It takes time for it to take effect…

But the best thing about our country is the freedom of choice…

undone1 said...

I found myself pregnant at 19 by a guy I had only known for 1 month. My first thought was to have an abortion. I had an appointment made and everything. To make a long story short I did not do it. That same child is 9 years old. The father...I married him and we have a total of 3 beautiful kids togethter. Not all stories turn out so well...but I don't think I could face myself If I ever snuffed out a life like that. It always amazes me how it's a baby when the person wants it...and its a problem when it is not wanted. In my opinion life is life.I like your blog by the way (smile).

skugga1302 said...

Being a man myself, I can hardly imagine completely how it would be to have to decide what choice to make in such a situation. However, certainly in the case of rape, it's not fair to expect that a women should bury the burden of what someone else did to her.
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JaySpice said...

I took it upon myself to explain to him that she may have been a victim of rape.

Or maybe she was ashamed. I am pro-choice also. I don't think I have a right to tell someone what to do what their body. I do, however, have a problem with women who use abortion clinics as birth control. I don't understand how the women in the clinic was so nonchalant. And what was with that guy. Was he proud that his women was getting a abortion? Craziness. Let me stop ranting.

Anonymous said...

abort a child?

this one i've never heard. is it okay to drown my two year old because he's becoming too much work. the above makes it seem like it is.

ladies, if you are indeed prochoice, don't go about telling ppl you have the right to abort a child, cos you don't. its called murder.

9jamommy said...

I got pregnant last year and I was having major problems with my boyfriend at the time (I know, don't ask how I got pregnant) whatever the case I wasn't ready for a pregnancy, I am pro-choice but I couldn't bring myself to have an abortion.

As a result, I am now the happy mother of a smiling 4-month old. Raising a child is not a joke, so I can understand why some people don't want to have children but, my logic was then was that I am old enough (was 24 at the time now 25) to have a child, and I make enough money so why not?

I do not regret my decision.