Monday, December 11, 2006

Baltimore top ten(The bad)

You know you are in Baltimore when:

1. 10 percent of the population has a heroin addiction. Baltimore has a population of about 500,000 and 50,000 heroin addicts. The 50,000 thousand does not include the number of people who are addicted to crack, ecstasy, weed(yes, there are people here who are addicted to weed)etc... I guess we should be happy that crystal meth has not made its way here yet. When(hopefully never) that happens then, this city will really be in trouble.

2. The public schools here suck. If you have a child and you want that child to know something beyond Jay Z's latest song you must pay for private school. Its as if those in charge are making it a priority to make sure there is a perpetual underclass here.

3. Public transportation sucks. We have three types of public transportation here: the bus, subway(metro),and the light rail. The subway only serves one side of town. The light rail and the subway only cross paths at two stops both within a block of each other. The bus is frequently late and as slow as all get out.

4. The rent is cheap(most of time). Don't worry you will spend any extra money that you save because of the cheap rent on a car because Baltimore's public transportation drives 60% of people batty after a while.

5. Home prices have begun to soar in parts of Baltimore because many people come here to flip houses. Thereby, making it harder to poor and working class people to ever be able to afford to purchase a home.

6. People here lack a sense of personal style. To many people here think that wearing a bunch of logos is stylish. If you wear anything like this you will probably get weird looks on the streets of Baltimore.

7. 85% of the young males here have a uniform that they wear all day, everyday: long white tee, Timberland boots, and dark jeans.

8. We have a large number of hipsters here. I notice that their style is rubbing off on a number of black people too(teens and 20-somethings). I am guilty of hipster style.

9. We have a large number of very big overweight people. It all almost seems like all of the obese people drove in overnight. The obesity rates are particularly astonishing in poor black neighborhoods where there are more fastfood places than supermarkets,clinics, drugstores and boutiques combined. Fast food/junk food is to African-Americans what alcohol is to Native Americans.

10. Sex in Baltimore is dangerous. I guess that is why I am holding back on my undiscovered freak. In a few studies Baltimore has been number one in various STD infections. There is an area of Baltimore where many of the young men have no problem sleeping with a woman who has HIV. Yes you read it right, no problem at all, as long as you don't look sick, they are willing to do the do.
Don't worry, Baltimore has some good points also. I will write about those next week.

22 comments:

wanna move 2 bmore said...

Quite interesting. Who is the mayor etc? How cheap r u talikg in terms of rent? How about the job market?

alissa said...

about #8... there are tons of hipsters in new york, too. particularly in my neighborhood due to gentrification. i complain about them daily...

ugh. i can't stand hipsters!

beautyinbaltimore said...

@ alisa- I read about Williamsburg. It is suppose to be the home of NY hipsters.
@wanna move to baltimore- the current mayor is Shelia Dixon. She became Mayor because the previous mayor Martin O'Malley was just elected Governor. In nine months we will have another election to chose a new Mayor.

The rents can range from 500.00-1,000 for a one bed room apartment. The best parts areas of the city are Mount Vernon, Federal Hill, Charles Villiage, Canton, Fells Point, Mt. Washington and Rolland Park. They are also the most expensive areas.

The job market is okay. If you are a left brainer, this may not be the city for you. Watch "The Wire" to get a true feel of Baltimore.

TDJ said...

Yeah, Baltimore is an interesting city. "The Wire" is definitely an accurate portrayal of B'more. I'm in DC, but I've been working in B'more for about 2 years now. I'm in Dundalk and that part of town doesn't even deserve a post. *lol*

Anonymous said...

Dang..I thought the Chicagoland area was rougher than Cell Block B (as in Bal-T-Mo), I guess not.

T.C. said...

Came across your blog via a couple of blogs...really interesting stuff...I really like it and will be back for more...

And Baltimore is a VERY interesting city..it always interesting how someone like me (from PG County/DC suburbs) refuses to be linked to Baltimore...I went to school there (UMBC) and just couldn't get into the "Baltimore scene" but now that I am older and have friends that are from there or live there...I find myself checking it out more...and have even thought about buying a home there since DC's housing market is CRAZY...

but anyways, sorry for the book...

Anonymous said...

lol @ "Fast food/junk food is to African-Americans what alcohol is to Native Americans".
Only been to B-more airport.

Anonymous said...

lol the last one is really funny, 1st time on ur blog, n 'm luvn it

Anonymous said...

Cheap rent?? My crib is almost as much as my spot in Harlem! Guess I need to consult you the next time I move. :)

Next can you do a post about where folks who AINT on The Wire chill?

afro jamaicano said...

damn, after hearing that i wudent move to baltimore for noting haha

u know i like ur blog b/c it mixes the right amount of personal interest stories (like this post and the ones about the guy u slept w/) and stories about celebes i'd say if ur site was a t.v. show it wude be "inside edition" not entertainment tonite, or extra haha luv it luv it! keep up the outstanding work

afro jamaicano said...

wuhs ection of the store is the Morningstar shih in? near the veggies, the cheeses the real meats? jus curious b/c i wanna try n cut out some of the meat from my diet

(also www.goveg.com has good info on becoming a veg. and http://www.vegcooking.com has some pretty good recipes, i think im gonna make this carrot ginger soup that's on there)

beautyinbaltimore said...

@afro jamaicano- Its in the frozen food section.

LovelyMonAmi said...

Sounds like a knock-off brand of NYC.

yankeenaijachick said...

Hey girl, how have you been? just checking on ya. Solid points well written. That's baltimore for ya. stay cool.

The Stiltwalker said...

I was in Baltimore not long ago and it definitely didn't tickle my fancy. My second time and I wasn't amazed at all.

Anonymous said...

Hmm is that the famed baltimore, I know it is a no-good city! Thanks for killing the holy. B-more!! LOL

Tired of being broke said...

No. 10 is scary in this day and age.

TTD said...

damn u make baltimore seem so horrible... it's not THAT bad... it really depends on where u hangin out at... seeing as though u go to morgan (i think)... of course u will see the negative....

be glad to see the positives of bmore next week...

yankeenaijachick said...

@beautyin baltimore, hey girl, how have you been...........l voted ya on my blog. check it out. stay loved.

Anonymous said...

LOVED this post! Im from DC, but I used to work at UM Baltimore. That city has so much potential, if the government and its citizens ever get their act together! Ill keep reading....

The Mistress said...

I've heard and read pretty bad shit about Baltimore (never been there though) but hey at least you're not in Detroit. That place is constantly rated THE WORST place to live in the U.S.

I do find it sad that cities with the highest population of black folks are always on some "list" for being a terrible place to live.

That ain't no coincidence.

Anonymous said...

WOW..that is really interesting
Girl, I love your insights..
I just have to shake my head with sadness at many of the things mentioned here. I dont know, I just wish we could do something. Its just sad that many African youth see this image of african americans (the baggy jeans, timbs, baggy white tee etc...: learning rap lyrcs before school work) and think its cool and want to emulate it.